Of Cats and Bells

We Indians don't have much to brag about, rather than our large brains, our educated young BPO worthy population and the difficulty levels of our national level examinations. Now AIEEE, IIT-JEE, IAS, CAT and the others on that list, revel in the fact that so many young people who should be playing and laughing and enjoying life, spend weeks and months of sleepless nights for a 2-3 hour performance, which is a stress test rather than a gauge of intellgence. The more lives ruined the higher the status of the exam. Now leaving that little debate for later, I would like to recount my experience at CAT.

Just like my performances at AIEEE, JEE and BITSAT, I didn't really prepare for it. Why? Because I am a full fledged Board topper! I don't like competitive exams. CAT just happenned in a moment of insecurity when placements had just begun. But it was a well taken decision in hindsight. I even signed up for Career Launcher's mock tests, gave two of them, never sitting for over an hour (its a 2.5 hour paper btw)

My test centre was at Jaipur, the exam was on the 16th of November. So me and Dhall, went by bus on 15th afternoon, and stayed at Baidy's place. I reached the centre at 9 am(we had to reach by 9.45 and the paper starts at 10.30) Almost an hour to take it all in.

When you reach the centre, its more like an exhibition of local (international) B-Schools-than a national level examination centre-most of whose hoardings have spelling errors, some even misspelt business!!! :) I wonder if they teach advertising, because if they can't do it properly for themselves... only God knows what they can teach. I wasn't so sure until now, but laptops have become really really cheap, all B-schools offer them for free :) and of course they talk of having 100% placements, with a picture of a pretty made-up girl in a call centre next to it. Brilliant!! People who do get duped into such institutes of higher learning deserve such jobs.

Then of course there are the coaching institutes. The only reason I can think of, for their weird names, is that there are now way too many such institutes and in an attempt to be unique they end up being hilarious. I made sure I had memorabilia of each, anyways I wasn't going to 'bell the CAT' I might as well make the most of the money spent. :)

I'll relate my entrance. They will by and large have the main gate locked so that people enter through a narrow passage, and they can catch you attention. First will be a couple of young fellows, with bright blue T-shirts, hired by TIME to shake your hands and wish you luck. Did they give brochures, NO, there were others for that. These guys just smiled and shook, what an amazing job, don't you agree. I won't even mention the guys from Proton, Neutron, Electron, Taxila, CATzilla and others giving brochures.

After this comes a stretch wherein there will be guys... in suits this time, wishing you luck again and tying black bands on your wrist. At first I took back my hand, thinking she was tying me a rakhi. Then I looked, and smiled as she 'banded' me. This was from Proton. The band had stuff written on it 'Aaj ka din mera hai' 'Main kar dikhaoonga/dikhoongi' 'CAT phod aayenge hum' 'Jeet lenge hum', aur agar yeh nahin kar paye to Proton mein admission le lenge hum, paise barbad karenge hum, but saala MBA karke rahenge hum!!

Just when you think you've had enough, you see the market of Indians writing CAT, and you feel apologetic for all the curses you've unknowingly flung at local B-Schools and ubiquitous, funny-named coaching centres. You see, when there are people aged above 20, with thick soda glassed spectacles , sitting with their parents, with the mother reciting some auspicious schlokas, with the father pating the guys, others openly flirting and whistling at anything that moves, some who, forget English... can't even speak Hindi for Godsake, some whose last minute preparations mean memorizing tables and meanings of words, smokers and drinkers all coming together to write one of the world's most competitive tests, it all starts to make sense. If it weren't for these coaching places, where would these people be. They would all be engaged in anti-social activities, not that they're not doing it now, but at least they attend classes and do they're anti-socialitities for lesser time. Forget micro-finance, food business and IT startups, open up coaching Institutes. Market is great, people are dumb, parents will spend no doubt, and success is irrelevant. Just make an impressive ad and put it on major dailies, have air-conditioned, spacious, and wi-fi connected classrooms and nothing can stop. And of course, don't forget the laptops.

The paper started and ended. I guess you have enough people to talk about how it was, so I'm not going to waste precious blogospace talking about it. After the paer again it was a great scene. I as usual had to do something silly. I usually drink a lot of water when I get up in the morning, this morning was the same. Just that I didn't go to the loo. Then of course, nature called.. midway into the test and very loudly too. But no harm done, didn't really affect my chances. :)

After the paper, everybody ran out. There was this one girl, who loudly announced, 'Yaar, kal raat night-out maara, and aaj paper mein so gayee' , another guy on the phone, doubtlessly talking to his coachng instructor, 'Sir saare ke saare questions attempt kiye and I am very confident, bas idhar udhar thode guess maare'... and more hilarious stuff.

All in all, it was a great decision, and for those who haven't tried to bell the CAT, do try, if you can't bell at least you'll have fun seeing others try!

Oasis Review Committee

Through the many ORCs that I have been to, I have always wondered about the efficacy of it all. Sure the idea, whoever thought of it, is excellent. A student forum where you discuss the fallacies and mistakes of the Oasis that went by, so as to better the one to come.

But whether a discussion like this, one that requires such co-operation, good intentions and clarity of thought on part of the attendants is really possible in a campus environment? My answer to this is, let's hope so.

So what about this ORC. Well, apart from the ridiculous (though entertaining) commentary, audacious points raised (aspect ratio of the screen!!! c'mon guys) and some un-cooperative individuals, I believe it was one of the better ones. And the fact that though there was a blame-game, it wasn't very serious implies (to me at least) that everybody is now mostly satisfied with their own jobs and what they have. Also seeing the level of co-operation among department/club heads (very clear from the large congratulatory feel of the entire meeting(it was almost as if all had conspired to hide something of the other)), I guess this is a precursor for better Oasis to come.

I don't think any out-of-the blue points got raised, most the chair was already aware of and measures were in place to deal with. I have to mention that Vijay did a fine job of chairing the committee. I had only two issues the Inaug and marketing of the fest!

The Inaug issue was raised several times, and I believe will be appropriately addressed. The second part being marketing.

Every year, this year especially, Sponz works day and night to get sponsorship. Thanks to our stars, they have always been successful. But we have to realize that re-inventing the wheel every year has its disadvantages. We need to have a vigorous marketing campaign to hype Oasis when the sem starts. This will help in several aspects, getting better participants, spreading awareness to sponsors, and add to the popularity of the fest.

I know, having been in the StuCCA how diffcult something like this is going to be, especially monetarily. But we've come quite far with our organisation and just about everything is as good as it could be, I believe this is the next step.

To conclude, I would like to congratulate all department/club people for their co-operation and dedicated work towards a wonderful Oasis.

Ever drowned in a rollercoaster??

I almost forgot about the Travelogue, until Chhotu reminded me the other day. I apologize for the inconvenience, and without delay let me continue.

So we were in Haridwar last time, after which the cars went straight to Rishikesh. Meandering terrain, oily food and sensitive tummies made the trip not so worthy of remembrance. Once we reached there, we took some time to inquire about rafting. After a lot of bargaining, we finally settled for the 26 km rafting, with night stay at their camp, with dinner, breakfast and lunch, all for Rs.1250 per head. I guess it was all more than worth it.

Now the problem with trips involving so much travelling are Nature's calls. Nature has such uncany timing, that its almost like a test, a punishment for our sins. Nature must be saying, "Hmm, so it was you who threw that biscuit wrapper ehh?? Take this!!" And no amount of medicinal, mental and gastromic precautions can prepare you for Nature's missed calls. Ignore them and you're in for it. Fortunately we had just been to Haridwar and all our sins were washed away, and the ones we commited after that weren't so bad. So the network was down mostly, but when the call did come through, there was always a place of worship nearby. :)

A long bumpy ride later, we were there. While the guy was giving us instructions, we were all joking around, he told us what to do in case this happenned or that. We listened half-heartedly. 'He's just telling us as a formality, like when a doctor tells you how much can go wrong in a procedure. It's definitely not gonna happen'. How very wrong we were then!!

After the initial few paces, when I was demoted due to my bad paddling(I have no qualms it, though I still feel he was a !@#$%). Good Afternoon, Rollercoaster, topsy turvy.. these aren't names of cocktails we had, but some rapids that we encountered. Rapids are classified into classes depending on how much you regret having gotten into the raft in the first place.

My raft toppled over the rollercoaster. Though most of you who've been to Rishkesh and didn't topple, will probably be giggling and ridiculing us, it was a brilliant experience. If you ask me, agar tu gira nahin, to tune asli mazaa nahin liya. And this isn't sour grapes, I am being very honest.

We were trapped under the raft and were only midway into the rapid. So when I did somehow get away from the raft to breathe all I got was half a mouthful. All my senses were heightened enormously. And my stomach was filled with Gangajal(guess the ones one my raft I needed cleansing from the inside too). In an attempt to save my life I grappled for anything I could latch onto. I think I got someones index finger, Think God, it didn't come off. Else there would be bigger problems. Finally when we got to the end of the rapid, I had a paddle in my right hand with someone on the other end and the index finger was replaced by a palm to my left. Though it was scary, when I close my eyes and relive that experience, in retrospect I wouldn't have changed it one bit.

The !@#$% then came to out rescue, and he seemed very less of a !@#$% then. :). Some had to be saved by the other raft. There were a few more rapids, but this time with our heightened sense of self, we were paddling better and no incidents followed. We did go overboard to float around, and jumped off an 18 foot cliff(weightlessness is thrilling), but those seem secondary now.

When we weren't paddling for our lives, we took time to take in God's creation at its very best.
Blinking as be an insult to all that we witnessed. No wonder sanyasis of yore came to these places, never to leave. The serenity and calm is endearing.

Much more to come. But later.